If you hear a voice within you saying “you are not a painter, then by all means paint...and that voice will be silenced” ~Vincent Van Gogh

So...I'm here. I finally did it. I'm a fully fledged artiste with my own art business. Except...am I? Fully fledged that is. At what point does one consider oneself to be an artist? At this point, when I've been drawing for only a couple of years? When I'm making a reasonable income from my art? When I've been offered an opportunity to display my art in the Tate gallery?
I mean...It's a tough one isn’t it? And I thought I'd write about it because if producing art brings up these issues for me then it probably does for others too, right? That little voice in your head telling you that yeah you draw, and maybe you can draw well, but that doesn't make you an artist.
My journey to this point hasn't been all that long, so perhaps there is an element of me not quite believing I should be on this path, because until fairly recently, I had no plans to start an art career. Everyone's lives got buffeted by the pandemic, mine included, and like many people, plans I had made were all of a sudden curtailed, like I'd been put on the naughty step. No forensic archaeology for you Heidi! And so there I was, left without a plan and when my children returned to school, without much of a purpose. I floundered and my anxiety flourished.

My art therefore, was cultivated from a desire to manage my anxiety, to calm me and give me a sense of achievement and joy. And the more I did it, the more it helped. But it was still just a hobby. And then people kept telling me that my art was good, that other people would like it too, that perhaps I should think about selling it. And then I got enquiries about commissions and suddenly...I began to think, yeah perhaps I could sell my art? Perhaps people would be interested? Perhaps I could start a YouTube channel and inspire people to pick up a pencil and learn to draw just like I did?
At the very least I had nothing to lose. But...and here's the thing, once I got started on this path, however much it hadn't been in my plans, it felt right. I feel like I'm exactly where I should be, doing exactly what I should be doing. And isn’t that an artist? I don't produce art simply because i think i might be able to make some money, i do it because of the pure unadulterated joy i get from making something beautiful that wasn't there before, because if i don't draw i feel miserable, because it's inside of me, compelling me to get it on paper and because i want to share my creativity and connect with others who also appreciate beauty.
So I'm going to do my best to quiet the doubting voice and if you’re feeling the same thing about your art, I'm encouraging you to as well. It doesn't matter whether you draw, paint, sculpt, write, sing; if you do it as a career or if it’s reserved solely for your own pastime and pleasure, if you create something, you’re an artist. Keep going. Keep creating.
With love
Heidi
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